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Prison: Last Week Tonight with John Oliver (HBO)

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America's prisons are broken. Just ask John Oliver and several puppets. Connect with Last Week Tonight online... Subscribe to the Last Week Tonight YouTube channel for more almost news as it almost happens: www.youtube.com/user/LastWeekTonight Find Last Week Tonight on Facebook like your mom would: http://Facebook.com/LastWeekTonight Follow us on Twitter for news about jokes and jokes about news: http://Twitter.com/LastWeekTonight Visit our official site for all that other stuff at once: http://www.hbo.com/lastweektonight
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Text Comments (5885)
Wimblo Pimpli (1 day ago)
So did the Jim Henson company provide the puppets
TriColoredTiger (1 day ago)
Zoos are just as bad as prisons for animals.
anime dorkfan (2 days ago)
Prisons should be places of correction not non humane cages that slowly drive people insane and early death. They should be like minimalistic apartments that like teach the prisoners to learn that they shouldn't resort to whatever crime they did or like a psychiatrist or rehab or other methods that should help people so they aren't likely to commit the crime again.
Ryan Anderson (2 days ago)
Thank Biden for the explosion of incarceration-- It was HIS bill that he WORKED SO HARD FOR. Super loser.
jACKIE kUTTAINEH (2 days ago)
Please watch if you've ever cared about any one in jail or prison...if you don't know any one, watch any way (aw come on it is 17 minutes and 42 seconds out of your life). Imagine if it was 20 years?
DIESEL0759 (2 days ago)
Last Week Tonight with John Oliver (HBO): The only show on television that has to deal with the racial profiling of crocodiles.
Angel Kon (3 days ago)
When I was in county this older inmate was having chest pains and they literally gave her nitro and put her in solitary. Idk if she's okay, I was released a few days later. I might try and find her on fb
Little wizard (3 days ago)
John Oliver effect In full effect 👊🏼
Daniel Campbell (4 days ago)
I mean...don't break the law? Seems like a good way to not go to prison.
Zackary N. (2 days ago)
@Daniel Campbell There are plenty of crimes that affect literally no one but the person committing the crime, unless you count the parents complaining about their college-age son smoking weed as affected. Due to minumum sentencing laws, a lot of adults are in prison for nothing other than possessing drugs. Rather than treat their addiction and get them back on the street again, by law we have to lock them up for a few years.
Daniel Campbell (2 days ago)
@Zackary N. Two VERY different things. One is a natural human function that is ingrained into our instincts to do. The other is imposing your own wants/needs at the expense of others.
Zackary N. (2 days ago)
Yeah, just like all you need to do to not get pregnant as a teenager is just not have sex! Look how well that's working out for us.
Sam Geuvenen (7 days ago)
Using sugar as an antiseptic? Wouldn't that do the exact opposite?
Donald Scott (7 days ago)
This guy is an imbecile!!
What Ever (8 days ago)
I found my new ringtone
TWSTF 8 (8 days ago)
Hey Aramark was the laundry service for our uniforms lol when I worked at Jiffy Lube back in the 90's. We'd grab a uniform out of the closet, and after wearing it for the day put it in a hamper that a giant white, "Aramark," truck would come and collect every week along with our red shop towels, (rags,) while dropping off clean ones.
Kyle Wagner (10 days ago)
Lol well there’s john’s audition role for the lion king
legend123ify (12 days ago)
You forgot jail break
Jose Gomez (14 days ago)
Jaja jajajja here in Bolivia the top prisioners rule the prisions and policeman aren’t allowed in
james durnford (14 days ago)
what can we do?
notfree25 (16 days ago)
Size of the cell is 1 person or 200 cups
Salvadori Popadillo (17 days ago)
I mean, it's way more than 4%. It's like an open secret, that's why people joke about it. There's no good way to report you're being raped and no one will believe you/do anything about it anyway.
Victor Todoran (17 days ago)
I have a wierd ideea. Why not stop using drugs?
Nepg3ar (18 days ago)
The drug used to treat coughing is actually still pretty similar to heroin in its effects. It basicly is heroin "light", just so they dont have to lable it as heroin.
G Hill (19 days ago)
Very little Justice in the American Justice system? In private run prisons, I've heard that judge's retirement pay is often based on the length of prison sentences. Also includes extra time for breaking any rules. Don't even look at conditions based on the bottom line as the #1 concern.
Raeanne Bedard (19 days ago)
I’ve known a few people who went to prison for assault (both because other guys were jerks to women), and apparently if you hurt women or children you have a bad time in jail
J F (20 days ago)
I miss Al Franken. He shouldn’t have been forced into resignation. An apology, ethics committee investigation, 60 minutes interview, and a concerted effort to make a difference. I can’t believe how big of pussies the democratic leadership are.
Daniel Cook (22 days ago)
My dad was the Florida Director of the Correctional Privitization Commision with Dr. Thomas. Dr. Thomas founded the idea, wrote the legislation. He used Mark Hodges as a scape goat, my dad got two tickets to Hawaii once, and his salary, 150K a year. They fucked him in 2002, I couldn't even finish high school, or go to University after GED! Also get this, I was IN a Florida Juvinile bootcamp, RAnger top status, which goes HOME in 14 days, they had to maintain 30 kids so I had to stay and ended up loosing rank and 5 months of my life!!!! Does all his karma fall on me!!!?
WhiteWolf75 (22 days ago)
Wauw.... Seems like America has yet again found a new way to practice slavery..! And in a very sneaky way this time...
Jay Harter (22 days ago)
This story was done in 2014 can you imagine what it's like now under Grand Wizard 45
Sam Spurgeon (23 days ago)
Kinda funny the privatization of prisons to companies to make a lot of money was happily approved by a bunch of people who should be in those prisons....
Thad Dunkin (23 days ago)
Other than the subject matter, that was one of the best shows I’ve watched.😎 #freethesmallfish
videotoygamer (24 days ago)
you know it's actually sad that a children's program, A LITERAL FREAKING CHILDREN'S PROGRAM cares about a certain subject, while the rest of us don't. It's sad that a small red monster from a Muppet franchise cares about everything else while, we don't give a literal crap. And honestly just like Maui says in Moana... "It's nice to see that humans never change"
Madd Maxx (25 days ago)
Hey dumb ass, it's because your war on open boarders
Ian Muir (25 days ago)
America the land of the free .With the highest incarceration population in the world
Kenji Sakamoto (25 days ago)
Don't forget Britians debt to China because the opium wars and British love of tea.
Tristan Wolfe (27 days ago)
I could eat 4 feet of party sub by myself.
Rainbow Butterfly (28 days ago)
I'm not really here to call him an idiot or anything all I'm saying is John Oliver or HBO whoever for whomever this concerns if you really want to fix the prison population you need to fix the fact that if you are convicted of any crime and you become a felon your constitutional rights do not apply to you in prison it is fact that your constitutional rights do not apply when you break the law you should actually do some research on this maybe you should change the law so their constitutional rights still exist in prisons or once you're convicted of a crime
Ruth I AM WHAT I AM ! (25 days ago)
@SimsulatedId 👏👏👏👉also acupuncture, hypnosis, yoga, meditation, but please stop 🙇🏻‍♀️⌨🤚
SimsulatedId (26 days ago)
Drink, Rainbutt. Do drugs, do some fucking thing. But for mercy's sake stop typing
Rainbow Butterfly (28 days ago)
you know rikers island is one of the most if not the most corrupt and worst prison in the country there is so much abuse on the prison population you know the guards they beat the prisoners they starve them there's a lot of abuse and another fact about the prison is that it's currently owned by the state of New York and while it's been owned by the state there's still been cases where people have been abused by prison guards and other prisoners and it was not a privately owned prison
Rainbow Butterfly (28 days ago)
there's most likely a good reason why they didn't use medication for the C-section in the prison you don't want to keep drugs around criminals most of which have a drug offenses
Ruth I AM WHAT I AM ! (25 days ago)
Lord Almighty 😳 what?!, are you serious ??? She had a C section have you ever had one? I did and is the worst pain ever, you need antibiotics and very strong pain medication because there's a high risk of infection, if that gigantic open wound don't heal properly you can die, is not a joke is serious thing to go through, you don't pour sugar on a surgery like that, that is just absurd and dangerous, I am speechless, appalled with your comment. 😳😟☹ know they broke the law at some point, they did bad, horrible things and they are paying for it, however they still 👉humans👈 (some of them) ! Just think about that , thank you.
Rainbow Butterfly (28 days ago)
and then he's making a joke about how black people go to jail for selling drugs and white people don't go to jail for selling drugs well I mean which one is more likely to be open to selling drugs in their community which one is the known drug dealer in the neighborhood and it most likely an African American male
Rainbow Butterfly (28 days ago)
he said something along the lines of he doesn't know why there's more black people locked up for drug crimes than white people will how many drug dealers do you know or Caucasian how many street-level dealers that can easily be get picked up by the police or Caucasian
Rainbow Butterfly (28 days ago)
He said something about drug problem in this country being solved yet right now we have an opioid crisis
Rainbow Butterfly (28 days ago)
I'm just critiquing him right now if he has an issue with the amount of people in prison in America why doesn't he talk about the laws that put them in there again this is early into a video I do not watch the entire video yet but he should talk about drug laws the war on drugs 😂
Rainbow Butterfly (28 days ago)
are we going to talk about rikers island before watch this video I just kind of got a question if we're talking about prisons can we please talk about rikers island can we also talked about how New York is a democratic voting City if they have the worst police brutality situation
QuiteDecent (29 days ago)
That was clearly a crocodile 🤷🏿‍♂️
Vonne Alie (1 month ago)
I wrote a paper on this! Thank you for doing this!!
Allen Colvin (1 month ago)
Prison$
Janice Smith (1 month ago)
NO MENTAL ILLNESSES; ONLY EDUCATION!!!!
Janice Smith (1 month ago)
give each prisoner a rescue dog or cat, abandoned homes, roof over their head for life, SHIP(NEW ROOF(WAIT 2 MORE YEARS AFTER SEAN TAKEOVER, ANOTHER 2 YEARS FOR A TOTAL OF 4 YEARS BACHELOR’S DEGREE( DIPLOMA IN HAND FOR COMPUTER PROGRAMMING & MEDICAL BILLING & CODING(THANKS TO MARY WARREN) FUCK YOU WARREN LEROY CHORD(IMMEDIATE EXECUTION(NO RELIGIOUS GROUPS ALLOWED AT EXECUTION’S PARTY)
Janice Smith (1 month ago)
BAYER IS FORMERLY ST JOSEPH ASPIRIN IN PINK; EQUATE BRAND IS TWIN PACK YELLOW FOR $4.00 81 mg. one daily(highly recommended for all!!!
Janice Smith (1 month ago)
SUGAR IS COCAINE
Janice Smith (1 month ago)
ST JOSEPH HOSPITAL IN TAMPA FL ON MLK JR BLVD(BUFFALO AVE PREVIOUSLY)
Janice Smith (1 month ago)
US FOOD SERVICE ON ST JOSEPH’S HOSPITAL, GONE!!!!!
Janice Smith (1 month ago)
CALLED IN & INQUIRED ABOUT THAT TITLE “PUSS IN BOOTS”, A LONG TIME AGO, WHEN I PICKED UP MY “WAR HORSE” MOVIE
Janice Smith (1 month ago)
PUSS IN BOOTS!! DID THEY GET THAT ONE AT SOUND EXCHANGE YET? IN TAMPA?
Janice Smith (1 month ago)
MY PRISONERS FROM WYOMING FOLLOWED ME TO FLORIDA & WILL BE FIGHTING IN “FITETV.COM”. GET YOUR PAY PER VIEW FOR THE FIRST FIGHT ON 6/22 IN TAMPA FL!! THEY WILL BE BEATING THE SHIT OUT OF EACH OTHER JUST TO “STATE THEIR CASES”, IN A SHADOW BOXING QUALIFIER FOLLOWED BY REHEARSALS IN UNIFORMS FOLLOWED BY HOW THEY WILL BE DEFEATING THEIR OPPONENTS, DETERMINED BY PINELLAS’ FINEST MAN FOREVER & EVER, AMEN!!!!
Opinunate ted (1 month ago)
Yea, I miss Al Franken.
D. Mills (1 month ago)
“...while your mind slowly becomes untethered.” OMG, coffee straight out the nose ☕️ 🤣
Laura Pickman (1 month ago)
Bring back Al Franken!!!!!
Chris yanover (1 month ago)
That state senator from Arizona was my best mans father John Kavanagh
Melissa Loos (1 month ago)
thanks for the zoo. glad to hear i am not the only one that sees it like this...
Marc Whinery (1 month ago)
I had a friend tell me he couldn't do anything that weekend, he was going to the prison a few hours away to visit a friend. I said, "wife or girlfriend?" "Huh?" he asked confused. "The woman he hit, was it his wife or his girlfriend?" "Oh, girlfriend and baby momma," he answered, mind churning how I could ask such a specific question, with no other information about the situation. 1) he was white. White people don't visit Black people in "prison" (jail is OK, but not prison). That increases their risk profile in prison. So he was visiting a white person. 2) he admitted he was seeing someone in prison. If he were visiting a murderer, he'd be less likely to visit, and more likely to hide that visit. Also, murder is more rare. 3) a white non-murderer in state prison would be there for a violent offense. Drug offenses of white people are usually ignored at the state prison level. You go fed, or you go home. 4) the most common violent offense for a male is assault of a woman. Bar fights aren't generally pursued as criminal matters, but left to civil courts and ignored. 5) almost all male assaults woman are domestic affairs. So he had to be visiting a whitegirlfriend beater. I estimated the probability to be above 95%, so assumed it and asked a follow-up question that assumes the answer I calculated. Of course, doing all the above calculations in under 2 seconds for a conversational answer seems like a trick you'd see in The Mentalist. But it usually works out. All you need is some basic understanding of the demographics of prison and you are good to go with similar party tricks, the next time someone mentions prison. Thankfully, the prison population in America is almost cartoonishly stereotypical, so such generalizations are trivial and correct.
Sean Donahue (1 month ago)
John you should know and that was a crocodile his bottom teeth were showing alligators only have Overlapping teeth from the upper jaw... but I kind of think comments like this were the reason that crocodilian puppet had an accurate portrayal of it's dental structure
Waggish Sagacity (1 month ago)
This is an outstanding show, but it seems to be about 6 years old (in 2019). How's our prison system doing under the Orange Menace? Better? Jeez, I didn't mean to crack a joke here.... Anyway, John, an update please. Thank You.
klancy kennedy (1 month ago)
It's a shame we lost Al Franken. He was a fucking hero in politics.
TheRedRaccoonDog (1 month ago)
The US has more people in prison than China but CHINA is somehow the authoritarian shithole? Good grief.
Loren Renee (1 month ago)
This is something that should NEVER EVER EVER be privatized.
Keona Welch (1 month ago)
Hard to watch.
jason gonos (1 month ago)
It is a disgrace that anybody would promote privatization of prisons. Making profit off of punishing people for breaking laws has an inherent conflict of interest that ultimately makes more laws that are easier to break to create more prisoners.
Ian Muir (25 days ago)
jason gonos Jeff Sessions had shares in private prisons
Thomas Flournoy (1 month ago)
The idea of any healthcare professional putting sugar into a wound is absolutely ridiculous, and if you think that offenders don't make things up to complain about then you've never been around offenders.
ZuRriX (1 month ago)
What a fucking disgusting person... (10:45)
mngentry (1 month ago)
Wow, he interacts WAY too well with those puppets. He's almost as good as Bob Hoskins acting off of Roger Rabbit (who was actually never there).
xtension xward (1 month ago)
wait so every 100th american is a criminal ? Jesus fuckin christ ! XD
Dina El Hakim (1 month ago)
rry Mystique - Ahla Haga Feeki ^^^@jk_rowling^@byoussef @melgnao @asabil
Sarah O'Connor (1 month ago)
Once you commit a crime in my country this is how you get treated! You murder, rape, or rob from me or my family you better be prepared to eat maggots, become someone's bitch and cry in yourself to sleep in a 10 X 7 cell at night. That's call justice you like this British liberal move to England! Love it or leave it! MAGA!
Brian Molina (25 days ago)
@Sarah O'Connor didnt get this comment for a while but wow is there so much broken logic youre spouting, its hilarious youre even a taxpayer at all 1.) when i say "non-violent drug offenses" i mean just being in possession of narcotics 2.) youre saying youd rather spend millions on keeping an inmate in prison for life for having some pot rather than have him go through rehab in order to become a responsible citizen, for like what 5 years? maybe 3? 3.) private prisons arent a dream come true, in fact they are the opposite. when you put a quota on how many people you can cage, youre the lowest form of human filfth and supporting it makes you as much as a shitstain as saudi arabia. god would never want humans to be made for profit, nor would he want our pitiful, childish need for justice be in the form of treating people like scum. sarah go fuck yourself please
Ian Muir (25 days ago)
Sarah O'Connor You should be in prison for your spelling
Sarah O'Connor (1 month ago)
Brian Molina "Non violent drug charges" you say? How do drug addicts get money for their drugs? Rob, cheat, and steal maybe? How many people, liquor stores, and hard working citizens got robbed or killed for a fix? You liberals want rehabilitation for these people who fund drug cartels? Who do you think should pay? Of course it comes out of mine and my husband's hard earned wadges! You want to rehabilitate these drug feinds then use your hard earned wadges to donate to them! How many innocent people died due to "non violent" drug offenses!? Ask the mules of the coyotes. Ask the citizens in the boarder towns who have to deal with thugs and cartels! In my America you fund the enemy even for a fix you pay. Just like the traider you are. Eat maggots, eat shit for all I care! Private prisons are a dream come true for hard working tax payers! This is true justice! God bless you MAGA!
Brian Molina (1 month ago)
and thats not justice thats what what savages and cowards do
Brian Molina (1 month ago)
that lack of empathy is why were going downhill. and you do know that the majority of people in prisons are in for DRUG CHARGES, and often non-violent drug offenses. so youre getting scared at an imaginary boogeyman
Kyla Dare (1 month ago)
Bro my school food is from Aramark
Gladwin Joseph (2 months ago)
The alligator line was 🔥
Nic DeGrave (2 months ago)
My state prisons are messed up. You have to pay rent for your cell and utilities, pay 100% of the price for your sentenced rehab, pay for your medical care, pay for socks and underwear and toothpaste and food and blanket. Say you get convicted of doing a drug and the judge is trying to be rehabilitative, so they require you participate in treatment. The treatment is 28,000 a month. The rent is 220. The medical care is 60-150 a visit. The socks are six dollars *a sock*, not a pair. You can't get released until you did your rehab (and some judges throw on fines if you're not going). If you're lucky enough that your family is talking to you and willing to give you a loan, you still get out owing either your family or the state a pile of money. That's what happened to my coworker's brother. He was so ashamed of bankrupting his 90 year old dad that when he got out he "just did one deal" to pay the money back--for which he broke parole and got a higher sentence. Stuff like that seems more disgusting but less baffling when you look at it through the lens of prison-for-profit.
Phil S (2 months ago)
A black man in charge. Irony lol
Car Mikislav (2 months ago)
Jim Hensons proud of this
Alex Smith (2 months ago)
At first, I thought that was a puppet of Pinkie Pie. Also, the war on drugs has failed on every level.
Spencer George (2 months ago)
https://soundcloud.com/cartel_de_atlanta/wraith
Justin Graves (2 months ago)
Holy shit our nation has failed when sesame street must do a prison song
Wulians sandchez (2 months ago)
Sh$t now I want to watch sesame street
katieducky23 (2 months ago)
"The average size of a cell is...........i guess.....your looking for the space? " 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
noirettebeauty (2 months ago)
Hey Team, how about addressing Toxic Masculinity/MRP/TRP/MRA? I know the premise of this show is exploring power dynamics (people v. government, people v. corporations), and online bullying, alex jones, and workplace harrassment have touched on toxic masculinity, but a deep dive on how American culture continues to permit [white, protestant, reactionary] American male entitlement, is long overdue Basically, I'm upset I married a European that gas started behave like a brainwashed, yee-haw Fox News-watching, sex-entitled, gun-entitled, selfish 'Murrkuhn. We've been married 6 years, and I'm starting to not recognize him anymore. I know this has to be the America effect.
sean callahan (2 months ago)
Wasn't Bill largely responsible for the War on Drugs? Why didnt Obama change this yet Trump is getting people out of jail. It confuses me greatly.
mike west (2 months ago)
To be fair, he was probably thinking of the size of the nets in hockey. 6x4
mike west (2 months ago)
The war on drugs is the reason. Legalize all drugs.
William Sr. Donaldson (2 months ago)
Prisons are big business nowadays. Turning people into felons, takes jobs away from them. Keeps them away from decent housing. And helps to cripple our economy. This forces them into meaningless jobs. That helps the country keep wages down and rent goes up.
Xellos Kaczor (2 months ago)
I mean, isnt it pretty obvious. You dont go to jail for using drugs, you go to jail for selling them. Who sells drugs? Thugs. And because of how they work, black ones are more likely to get caught. Police and DA do not let white dealers go, they just are harder to catch. And frankly, if that ends with "racist results" then i dont give a shit, first priority is less drug dealers, not some fucked up equality of outcome. Obviously there are racist cops, and thats a problem, but people caught WERE DRUG DEALERS. Noone is getting framed, noone is getting let go for being white, so while its not entirely perfect, its more or less working fine. What far left would like us to believe is that we should be seeing more white people going to jail, because more white people sell drugs, but its never that easy. Black people sell drugs in black neighbourhoods, that have astonoshingly high crime rates, so obviously there are more nervous cops prone to being suspicious around. White people sell drugs in white neighbourhoods, where there are less cops. But you know what less of there is there too? Crime in general. System is not racist, some cops are, but as long as no innocent people end up in jails - and they do, and thats the problem i would LOVE to have adressed and put racist cops responsible in prisons instead - its working as intended. So instead of focusing on "too many black people" in jail, we should stop being racist and see them for what they are. People. Guilty or innocent, and act on that. And if you feel bad for children with dad's in jail, how about you finally tackle the actual issue, why is there crime, rather than why is catching criminals not perfect representation of white-black spread of people in america. You guys need to fix your poor neighbourhoods. By force if necessary. Republicans are bunch of racists, but they arent wrong on that one.
Liliana Hudler (1 month ago)
Also, arresting drug dealers alone does not in any way decrease the amount of drug dealers. It's a multibillion-dollar industry, they don't give a fuck if you eliminate a single employee chain. They replace it overnight! Are you one of those dumbfucks who believes that the War on Drugs was a success?
Liliana Hudler (1 month ago)
Wait are you serious? Do you think people don't go to jail for using drugs? Are you high right now? Where the fuck did you get that information from? Huge swaths of the prison population are people who are there merely for consuming an illicit substance. I myself have been in jail for smoking weed. I also watched someone go to jail for using fucking amoxicillin without a prescription. What the fuck is wrong with you man? Where are you getting your information from? What fucking planet do you live on?
Is Egg (3 months ago)
You can see how angry john is here...
kackerlakensalat (3 months ago)
Search for Jeff Rose, he had a ted talk about German prisons
ZDU (3 months ago)
As bad as it seems, if sugar works as an antiseptic, why not use it? Apparently they still use honey, according to my vague memory of Horrible Histories.
TheStapleGunKid (3 months ago)
Let's face it, the reason prison rape is treated as a joke is because the victims are mostly male. Rape of women is the gravest of crimes that must be fought with all effort, while male rape is a punchline.
S. E. Hebert (3 months ago)
you said struggling to _recall_ the size of a cell --the director would have to _know_ first. Messed up!
facts about ur mum (3 months ago)
JOHN KNOWS HOW TO GET TO SESAME STREET. Can you tell me how, John? Can you tell me how to get... How to get to Sesame Street?
Bella Nova (3 months ago)
Sadly, much larger that my dorm room at Parsons the new school. Possibly less cockroaches. Then again, every room on New York is solitary confinement, minus the solitude.
Dallas Boring News (3 months ago)
The Dallas Morning News endorses all who hate Dark Chocolate Cheerios.
Gilhelmi (3 months ago)
Sesame Street also teaches children how to handle the fact that a parent died while serving in the military (or police). No, I am not joking, I still have the DVD's.
Lindalee Law (3 months ago)
Ever since the guards won't allow riots .....
Toby Bartels (3 months ago)
Maybe a multiple murderer is best off in prison if we can't think of anything better, but it's not a different subject; their conditions matter too.

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